How to Spice Things Up – Mutual Masturbation

I think Naive Nancy gets asked one thing most consistently, what are some easy ways to spice up a sex life. So I think I’m going to do a series about it:  How to spice up your sexual relationship. I know, creative title, forgive the lack of imagination. For the first installment in that series, I’d like to discuss mutual masturbation.

Let’s start by defining mutual masturbation. Mutual masturbation is when both partners are masturbating at the same time. This is preferably done in the same room, but it can be accomplished via phone sex or video chat.

This is easiest to describe the appeal from a male’s perspective. I have found that most men are really turned on by the idea of women playing with themselves. It’s kind of a standard fantasy.

I know, from my own perspective, it’s really hot to watch my man pleasure himself. To see how he handles himself. It’s like watching live porn. That’s part of the draw of mutual masturbation, you’re both playing with yourselves, using each other as erotic viewing material. I think it creates an additional vulnerability to a normal sexual situation to be open and pleasuring yourself in front of your partner. And anything that makes you more vulnerable in front of your partner is an opportunity to grow closer and bond.

One benefit to mutual masturbation, for both parties, is the ability to see exactly what your partner likes. When you pleasure yourself, you know what you like best. So watch what your partner’s doing and employ some of those techniques the next time you get your hands on them.

Another benefit is that it can be done during a woman’s period. For guys that are squeamish around that time of the month, this is a great way to get in some sexy time without having to deal with the mess. But know your partner. Some are not in the mood that time of the month, and some really are hurt by the lack of intimacy. Everyone’s different.

So the next time you’re looking for something new to add to the bedroom, think about adding this to your repertoire.


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