Dipping Our Toes Into the Scary….

No I do not suddenly have a foot fetish. Let’s just get that out of the way right now. I know what you were thinking.

We’ve recently dipped our toes in the waters of couples dating. Let me explain.

While discussing our fantasies and pushing our boundaries, we have found that both of us like the idea of voyeurism, exhibitionism and adding people to the mix. We’re really not sure how deep these fantasies run, are they purely exciting on a cerebral level, or would we actually like to try them. But at this point we’re interested enough to at least meet others with similar interests.

I have likened it to couples dating. We’d like to meet couples for dinner, drinks, conversation and maybe some flirting. Doesn’t that sound divine? At this point I think I’d be completely satisfied with just that. I mean, after all, I have no one to talk to in real life about all this sex stuff. Having someone to talk to in person would be quite the novelty.

Now, how do you go about meeting couples? Well, there are websites out there for that. Similar to match.com and the likes, but for couples in alternate lifestyles. I don’t know that I particularly like the label “alternate lifestyles,” so at least while you’re here with me, let’s ignore that.

So we’ve put ourselves on a dating website, we’ve gotten some interest, but now to actually pull the trigger and go through with it. To actually meet someone? That is the scary stuff. See, Romeo (at least that’s what the poll tells me I should call him) and I have been together for over a decade. We’ve been married for 10 years, but together, even longer than that. So it’s been a REALLY LONG TIME since I’ve had to meet someone new. And all that that entails. You know, nerves….worrying about my appearance, and mannerisms, etc. These are things I haven’t had to consider in forever.

This is just one of many things I love about long term relationships. Having everything, and I mean everything, out on the table and you still come back for more.

I yearn for the anonymity of Naive Nancy, but alas, if I wish to ever make real connections that cannot be. I think I’m going to have to put myself out there if I wish to see results.

Anyone have experience with this and can provide some insight? I’d love first hand advice and recommendations.

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8 thoughts on “Dipping Our Toes Into the Scary….

  1. We’ve dipped our toes and met a few couples we can have this kind of relationship with. One is a couple who were purely vanilla fiends who are now flirty friends. That is fun but risky because they know our other friends. Others are friends we met through a dating site but it is hard to be just flirtation and not swinging.

    • Thanks for sharing. That’s kind of why we went on a dating site. We are extremely private about our personal lives and it would be strange for us to get anywhere close to our normal social circle.

      • We had the same concern and have been very selective about who we are more open with (it is very, very few). Having said that, we have other friends who are extremely open about their sexuality – not to the point of overbearing, but just very honest – and I can;t help but admire them for it

      • that’s exactly it. We do not want to swing and most of the people on these sites, while really respectful of others limits, are looking for swinging relationships

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