So while surfing the interwebs this evening, Romeo found a funny meme referencing the stereotypical theme music for sex, “Bowchickawow-wow.” While it was humorous, I couldn’t help to think about how dated that reference is. If we could “re-write” the stereotypical song/jingle representing sex, what would it be? I came up with a few ideas with the help of some friends. Do any of these apply to you?

Do you have a partner who’s in the dog house? Not going to be getting any “lovin” any time soon? Try one of these as your new theme song.

En Vogue – My Lovin’ (Never Gonna Get It)

MC Hammer – Can’t Touch This

Equally as cheesy as “bowchickawow-wow,” but with an 80s flair.

Def Leppard – Pour Some Sugar on Me

Tone Loc – Wild Thing

You’re in the mood for dirty animal sex?

NIN – Closer

Bloodhound Gang – The Bad Touch

How about a marathon sex session?

AC/DC – You Shook Me All Night Long

International Man-Whores need their own anthems too, right?

Jason Derulo – Talk Dirty To Me

What about cheap whores?

AC/DC – Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap


How about oral sex?

112 – Peaches & Cream

50 Cent – Candy Shop

Need some inspiration to try out sex in dangerous places?

Nickelback – Animals

I’m fairly certain this talks about sex. Here’s your international reference. Bonus points if you can understand all of it.

Rammstein – Pussy

And finally, I had a hard time classifying this one, but this man hung out in an abusive cheating relationship just for the sex.

Limp Bizkit – Nookie

This was a fun game. Do you have any recommendations?